THOSE BASTARDS

From those fat fucks that brought you Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Ice Cream, more ridiculous flavors:

• ONE Cheesecake Brownie (Add inches to your waistline and fight world poverty and disease at the same time!)
  
  
• Imagine Whirled Peace (Enjoy this whirly mixture of toffee cookie chunks and fudge peace signs, carefully blended into a mixture of caramel and sweet cream ice creams. Tastes like Yoko Ono’s ass!)
  
  
• Cake Batter (Yellow Cake Batter ice cream with a chocolate frosting swirl!)

Hey, if I want cake, I’ll eat cake. If I want ice cream, I’ll eat ice cream. (Of course, I said the same thing about raw chocolate chip cookie dough, and look where that got me.)

Who else but Ben and Jerry (Growing America’s Ass Since 1978™) could come up with these ice cream flavor combinations? I’ve gotta hand it to ’em - they know what makes the average American ice cream eater tick. And it ain’t broccoli.

Great. Just fucking great. Another reason to stay the hell out of the ice cream aisle at the Stoopid-Market.

Gawd help me.