I don't mean you, Friends, Family and Fun Readers.
(I love alliteration!)
Nope, I mean the poor misguided fools who end up on my blog due to their
bizarre Google searches...
I use Site Meter to keep track of hits, searches and where people are coming from.
Before I share the crazies, let's see the usual suspects. By that, I mean, the search phrases that turn up the most hits:
1. Scalene Triangles.
I get so many people searching for this phrase.
Read about my 12 yr old's homework involving scalene triangles.
2. Star Wars Gunships
I have so many posts about Star Wars.
There's the time Obi-Wan (the younger, sexy version) gave me a pink light saber.
Or there's Barbie's take on a Republican gunship.
3. Pork Chops Soaked in Buttermilk.
This pork chop recipe I found on the Internet is DELICIOUS.
4. The Pioneer Woman.
I get lots of hits from Pioneer Woman searches because I did an interview with her.
5. Gross Nursery Rhymes or Nursery Rhymes Go Bad.
Yep, I did share a nursery rhyme gone bad.
6. Hilarious Country Songs.
Yes, I wrote a hilarious country song.
There are others, but I want to share the really scary stuff.
The phrases that somehow lead people to my site...and I have no idea how.
Here they are:
"I'd like to be Barbie"
(Dude, she's plastic)
"Dreams what does it mean when a ghost is taking your soul?"
(oh, well, I did have that dream about the ghost mermaid trying to steal souls)
"id like to shoot you in the a**"
(I have no idea what this one is about)
"what does it mean when you have things like goose bumps on your v*gina?"
(Yep, once again, no vajayjay talk on this blog, I swear.)
"stuffed animal uterus"
(Oh, yeah, those weird stuffed organs...those were cool)
"mature man is a sunscreen"
(No idea what this led to)
"can you inflate a v*gina?
(I'm lost. Why would this lead to my site?!)
"1900's gay men"
(Hey, that photo of my relative from the 1900's, he was NOT gay)
"bought car ebay never came"
(my grandmother bought one successfully off EBay)
"Sticky ball on ceiling"
(oh, good, I'm not the only one)
"we'll get back to you soon"
(Sure you will. I won't hold my breath)
"mermaids dream interpretation"
(Yep, ok, I did have that mermaid dream)
"smoothie made in v*gina"
(I'm totally grossed out and creeped out now)
(I love alliteration!)
Nope, I mean the poor misguided fools who end up on my blog due to their
bizarre Google searches...
I use Site Meter to keep track of hits, searches and where people are coming from.
Before I share the crazies, let's see the usual suspects. By that, I mean, the search phrases that turn up the most hits:
1. Scalene Triangles.
I get so many people searching for this phrase.
Read about my 12 yr old's homework involving scalene triangles.
2. Star Wars Gunships
I have so many posts about Star Wars.
There's the time Obi-Wan (the younger, sexy version) gave me a pink light saber.
Or there's Barbie's take on a Republican gunship.
3. Pork Chops Soaked in Buttermilk.
This pork chop recipe I found on the Internet is DELICIOUS.
4. The Pioneer Woman.
I get lots of hits from Pioneer Woman searches because I did an interview with her.
5. Gross Nursery Rhymes or Nursery Rhymes Go Bad.
Yep, I did share a nursery rhyme gone bad.
6. Hilarious Country Songs.
Yes, I wrote a hilarious country song.
There are others, but I want to share the really scary stuff.
The phrases that somehow lead people to my site...and I have no idea how.
Here they are:
"I'd like to be Barbie"
(Dude, she's plastic)
"Dreams what does it mean when a ghost is taking your soul?"
(oh, well, I did have that dream about the ghost mermaid trying to steal souls)
"id like to shoot you in the a**"
(I have no idea what this one is about)
"what does it mean when you have things like goose bumps on your v*gina?"
(Yep, once again, no vajayjay talk on this blog, I swear.)
"stuffed animal uterus"
(Oh, yeah, those weird stuffed organs...those were cool)
"mature man is a sunscreen"
(No idea what this led to)
"can you inflate a v*gina?
(I'm lost. Why would this lead to my site?!)
"1900's gay men"
(Hey, that photo of my relative from the 1900's, he was NOT gay)
"bought car ebay never came"
(my grandmother bought one successfully off EBay)
"Sticky ball on ceiling"
(oh, good, I'm not the only one)
"we'll get back to you soon"
(Sure you will. I won't hold my breath)
"mermaids dream interpretation"
(Yep, ok, I did have that mermaid dream)
"smoothie made in v*gina"
(I'm totally grossed out and creeped out now)
I swear, I have NO idea how some of these search phrases led to me.
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