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Saturday, November 17, 2007

JACKASS DU JOUR

Welcome to Jackass du Jour, a new semi-regular feature of Blog d’Elisson in which I’ll post photographs of Random Idiots on the Road.

Jackass du Jour
Jackass du Jour.

Today’s Jackass du Jour is Mr. Genius-in-the-Pontiac, shown here driving 80 MPH less than one car length behind a fuel truck on Interstate 85.

Taking a tip from Lance Armstrong and the other folks in the Tour de France, our JdJ is using the time-honored technique of drafting: getting close enough to someone’s ass to eliminate almost all wind resistance. You get a big boost in gasoline mileage that way. So what if you have exactly zero visibility driving mere inches behind a humongous truck? So what if Mr. Fuel Truck, by merely tapping on his brakes, can cause you to jam your car right up into his tank full of highly combustible petroleum distillate? So what if you end up like one of those self-immolating Buddhist monks on Velociman’s sidebar?

Lance Armstrong, man! He beat Nut Cancer! Yeah, be like him!

Update: Astute reader Bob Boobbooey points out that the truck is not a fuel truck; there’s no placard indicating flammable or combustible cargo. Good catch, Bobbo. But our Jackass is no less a Jackass, because if you smack into the back of that truck, you’ll be just as dead, whether it’s carrying gasoline, diesel oil, or milk.

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