It all began that night at the Workbench -- yeah, I know, the regulars are a bunch of tools but, hey, it's handy, man.
Me and some of the other fellas were drinking Rusty Nails -- it'd been that kind of a week and I was ready to get hammered.
Me and some of the other fellas were drinking Rusty Nails -- it'd been that kind of a week and I was ready to get hammered.
Nine-Inch Nails was playing and the pounding beat was really getting to me when all of a sudden Brad says, 'Hey, hey, hey, look at that hot-dipped, galvanized little number. How'd you like to nail that one?"
And I see her over there, all shiny-slim and sharp-looking. She's with a couple of tacky losers, you know, the kind they always say has a terrific personality, but this one, well, she can ride in my nail belt any time!
And I see her over there, all shiny-slim and sharp-looking. She's with a couple of tacky losers, you know, the kind they always say has a terrific personality, but this one, well, she can ride in my nail belt any time!
So I sort of meander on over to where she is and offer her a coffin-nail. We stand there smoking for a while, just kind of getting to know one another. I ask does she come here for the music and she says yeah, I hit the nail on the head -- it sure wasn't for the company.
Turns out her name's Penny and she's got a boyfriend named Spike but I know this Spike --thinks he's a big stud when he's nothing but a common framing nail --I could chew him up and spit out carpet tacks.
One thing leads to another and I ask can I drive her home. She wants to know am I hitting on her but than she says yeah and ditches the girlfriends and once we're at her place, it doesn't take long for us to get to the point, if you know what I mean.
++++++++++
I didn't see her again - months went by and one night I'm on the computer, checking out exotic fasteners and then watching a video called 'Nailin' Palin.' when I get a call.
It's the hot number from the bar. She has to remind me and then-- well, not to put too fine a point on it, she tells me I'm a daddy -- says there's all these little nails and they're crowding her out of the house and she wants me to do something.
It's the hot number from the bar. She has to remind me and then-- well, not to put too fine a point on it, she tells me I'm a daddy -- says there's all these little nails and they're crowding her out of the house and she wants me to do something.
I think I'll go get hammered.
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