MERRY FISKMAS

Mac over at pesky’apostrophe slaps CNN’s Roland Martin upside the head for his semi-obtuse editorial concerning the Christmas season.

Parts of Martin’s article make perfect sense. Unfortunately, other parts are so appalling that I wanted to take a shot at it as well, especially since comments are closed on his post.

Let’s have some Fisky Fun, shall we?

This whole push to remove Christ from the Christmas season has gotten so ridiculous that it’s pathetic.

Who, exactly, is trying to “remove Christ from the Christmas season?” Let’s keep reading and find out!

Because of all the politically correct idiots, we are being encouraged to stop saying “Merry Christmas” for the more palatable “Happy Holidays.” What the heck are “Seasons (sic) Greetings”? Can someone tell me what season we are greeting folks about?

The Holiday Season, numbnuts. “Season’s Greetings” or “Happy Holidays” includes both Christmas and New Year’s Day...and if by chance you’re speaking to someone from a non-Christian faith tradition, you can even stretch it to include Chanukah. Or Ramadan, if it happens to fall in December. Or Kwanzaa, for those who observe it. There’s nothing “politically correct” about it...it’s just all-inclusive. Get over yourself.

A Christmas tree? Oh, no! It’s now a holiday tree.

Yeah, I agree with you there: that is stupid. Because decorating trees is a pagan custom that got subsumed by Christianity specifically for the celebration of Christmas. Calling it a “holiday tree” is ridiculous and insulting. My holiday has nothing to do with it. Don’t do me any unasked-for favors.

Any Christmas song that even remotely mentions Christ or has a religious undertone is being axed for being overtly religious.

Whether this is an issue depends on the venue. In public schools? Keep it nonreligious, please - not everyone is a Christian. Private venues? Go for it, Bunky. Get as religious as you want. I don’t see any lack of religious-themed Christmas music on the raddiddio.

And I’m sorry, forget X-M-A-S. Malcolm X? Yes. X replacing Christ? No.

Sorry, Roland: You’re displaying your ignorance. The “X” in “Xmas” does not “replace Christ.” It’s the Greek letter chi...the first letter of christos (Greek for Messiah, meaning the Anointed One). It’s an abbreviation, but a polite one...ya dumb fuck schmo.

Don’t get me wrong; I’m very respectful of other religions. I don’t want anyone to be afraid of discussing the Jewish faith when we address Hanukkah. And we shouldn’t dismiss Muslims when the annual pilgrimage to Mecca is held during December. In fact, Americans are so ignorant of other faiths that we can all learn from one another.

Nobody’s “afraid” of anything here...but this is a bit of apples ’n’ oranges. Chanukah (or Hanukkah - spell it any old way in English) is a minor holiday, and the Muslim hajj pilgrimage is a required act of faith. They’re really not comparable to Christmas, the holiday that dominates American society beginning right after Hallowe’en.

But this seeming backlash against Christianity is bordering on the absurd, and we should continue to remember that Jesus is the reason for the season.

Backlash? Backlash? Aren’t we getting a little...overheated with the rhetoric, here, Roland? Give me a fucking break.

I know that may sound strident, but it’s true. We spend an inordinate amount of time focused on shopping and buying gifts, but really, what does any of this have to do with the birth of Jesus? We have families all over the nation killing themselves to buy a tree they can’t afford, running up their credit to buy toys and other gifts, all in an effort to make someone else happy.

What if families decided to forgo gifts, and instead, used their shopping days giving back to those in need? What if more of us went into our closets, grabbed old toys and clothes, repackaged them, and provided them as gifts to those without? Instead of gorging on food, what if we used some of the dough to feed those who are in need? What if we blew off those gift cards to electronic retailers and signed up with Networkforgood.org, and gave someone a gift card to their favorite charity?

Sure, I know I sound like a reincarnation of a flower child, but really, do we have to be so crass during the Christmas season?

Not that it really concerns me, but here, Roland, you have hit upon a nugget of truth. Christmas has been taken over by the merchants, alas...and Americans don’t really seem to give a shit. But, since I don’t celebrate Christmas, it’s not my problem to solve.

Its (sic) time that we return to traditional values, and end this ridiculous charade. It’s important that we take a fuller account of WHY we celebrate Christmas, as opposed to falling for the barrage of ads that tell us what is most important.

Parents, don’t be so consumed with the notion that your children will have a terrible Christmas because the tree isn’t overflowing with gifts. The true love that you show them is more important than anything else.

Amen, bruthuh.

America might be the king of capitalism, but secularism must never become so prevalent that our religious traditions are discarded.

Don’t blame the secularists for “discarding religious traditions.” They’re a convenient scapegoat. I don’t have a problem with nonreligious people, and you shouldn’t, either. They’re part of the crazy-quilt social landscape of America, along with the Baptists, the Mormons, the Catholics, Jews, Muslims, Buddhists, Hindus, Wiccans, agnostics, and atheists. At least in this country, we make a reasonable attempt at getting along.

Thus endeth my rant. [Gets down off soapbox]