If it comes down to Google vs. China, my money's on Google.

If you happen to listen to the news, you know that China & Google are about to duke it out.

 Google accounts were hacked by perhaps politically-motivated attacks on Chinese human rights activists accounts.

And Google was not the only victim...according to the Official Google Blog "at least twenty other large companies from a wide range of businesses--including the Internet, finance, technology, media and chemical sectors--have been similarly targeted."

Now, Google has been operating in China since 2006, albeit under restrictions and censorship that it agreed to.

But, now, it looks like the gloves are coming off.

Google's had enough, and I agree with them.

I don't approve of censorship.

China kind of freaks me out.

It seems awfully archaic.

Kind of like a perverted great-uncle who wears socks with his sandals.

and makes bad jokes.

And no one wants to sit next to but everyone has to  be nice to because he has a lot of money...

You get the idea.

I've got your back, Google.

BUT, wait a second, I had a thought...

what if Google's been censoring us all along and we've never realized it?!

Crap.

Ok, if I disappear tomorrow after this posts,

then go after Google.

And China.

And Osama Bin Ladin.

Amen.

Strange things I've learned while on Twitter

I'm on Twitter a lot more now than I used to be.

(I'm TexasRhea)

Why?

Because I am helping the companies I work for Tweet:

United Credit Source

Total Score Repair

Elite Debt Management

And I've started "following" some interesting Twitterers.

NASA - I followed their recent Atlantis Shuttle mission to the Space Station and then it's landing.

I learned from ZAPPOS CEO Tony Hsieh that "Did u know if u put a raisin in a glass of champagne, it will go up&down continuously? This has been our entertainment tonight."

I learned about Mystery Google, where you get what the person before you was searching for.

Cue scary, laughing manequin!

Have you learned anything interesting on Twitter?

Do you follow anyone famous?  Or infamous?

The Doodles of Google

Did you notice that Google has two "L"s today?

Do you know why?

Google is celebrating it's 11th Birthday!!

Happy Birthday, Google!!

Have you noticed the different Google Doodles over the years to celebrate different themes?

Have you ever visited Blackle?

They are so creative and awesome.

Google Doodle artist Dennis Hwang is responsible for most of them.

Do you have a favorite?

I doodle.
I don't get paid for it though.

I Google too.
and don't get paid for that either.

Darnit.

Poor Misguided Fools

I don't mean you, Friends, Family and Fun Readers.
(I love alliteration!)

Nope, I mean the poor misguided fools who end up on my blog due to their
bizarre Google searches...

I use Site Meter to keep track of hits, searches and where people are coming from.

Before I share the crazies, let's see the usual suspects. By that, I mean, the search phrases that turn up the most hits:




1. Scalene Triangles.
I get so many people searching for this phrase.
Read about my 12 yr old's homework involving scalene triangles.




2. Star Wars Gunships
I have so many posts about Star Wars.
There's the time Obi-Wan (the younger, sexy version) gave me a pink light saber.
Or there's Barbie's take on a Republican gunship.




3. Pork Chops Soaked in Buttermilk.
This pork chop recipe I found on the Internet is DELICIOUS.





4. The Pioneer Woman.
I get lots of hits from Pioneer Woman searches because I did an interview with her.





5. Gross Nursery Rhymes or Nursery Rhymes Go Bad.
Yep, I did share a nursery rhyme gone bad.





6. Hilarious Country Songs.
Yes, I wrote a hilarious country song.






There are others, but I want to share the really scary stuff.
The phrases that somehow lead people to my site...and I have no idea how.






Here they are:



"I'd like to be Barbie"
(Dude, she's plastic)

"Dreams what does it mean when a ghost is taking your soul?"
(oh, well, I did have that dream about the ghost mermaid trying to steal souls)

"id like to shoot you in the a**"
(I have no idea what this one is about)

"what does it mean when you have things like goose bumps on your v*gina?"
(Yep, once again, no vajayjay talk on this blog, I swear.)

"stuffed animal uterus"
(Oh, yeah, those weird stuffed organs...those were cool)

"mature man is a sunscreen"
(No idea what this led to)

"can you inflate a v*gina?
(I'm lost. Why would this lead to my site?!)

"1900's gay men"
(Hey, that photo of my relative from the 1900's, he was NOT gay)

"bought car ebay never came"
(my grandmother bought one successfully off EBay)

"Sticky ball on ceiling"
(oh, good, I'm not the only one)

"we'll get back to you soon"
(Sure you will. I won't hold my breath)

"mermaids dream interpretation"
(Yep, ok, I did have that mermaid dream)

"smoothie made in v*gina"
(I'm totally grossed out and creeped out now)

I swear, I have NO idea how some of these search phrases led to me.

Google This, Man.

This is my first GOOGLE post. I've seen it before on countless blogs....where bloggers post all the hilarious, bizarre and freaky search words that led people to their blogs.


Well, now it's MY turn.

I'm kind of sad because with my blog address change, Google has lost me.

I'm unsearchable.

I'm invisible.

I don't exsist if Google can't find me.

I don't know how long it's going to take to be found again. I submitted my blog to their search engine again with the new address, but who knows.

So, due to an absence of funny search word results, here are some words people have searched with in the past and ended up on my blog:


Why am I afraid of pool drains? Oh man, when you figure that out, let me know, because I am too.

Bubblegum in Latin Dude, Romans didn't have bubble gum, so there IS no word for it. AND, let me clue you in, no one speaks Latin anymore, except the Pope, and I don't know about you but I haven't spoken to him lately...

Really, really intellectual things to say Oh, dude, you are SO at the wrong spot. I mean, I'm smart but I don't go around talking intellectually.

Sticky balls leave marks No kidding. Ours was up on the ceiling for months until my husband took it down. I had someone tell me they had one on their ceiling for a year. I think ours would have been. And, yes, it left a mark.

Can seals feel love Let me show you this picture, and you tell me what you think...

I see mommy/baby love here. Enough said.

Texas word for house Ummm, I hate to break it to you, but we here in Texas, we mainly speak ENGLISH. So, the answer you're lookin' for is HOUSE. Now, sometimes we use the Spanish word CASA but that's Spanish, not Texan.

Frog does not drink up the pond Well, I'm not sure what to say. What's really scary is that this phrase has shown up more than once and in different variations over a long period of time. Is this some secret agent code or something?

Break out on butt OMG, I'm so sorry. No one should have to deal with that. That totally sucks. Not sure why this led to me though, because I've never posted about butt break outs at all.

Butt Facials Oh, yeah, I did do a post on this. hehe It was funny.

Souped up Johns Ok, guilty. I had this picture and a whole post about it:

Cow teats or cow udders I get a LOT of searches with these words. I mean, at least 40 or so. Not sure why everyone's interested in this. Yes, I milked cows growing up on a ranch...and I recently bought my husband a cow udder cup from Wisconsin when I was up there for a writing retreat. And, being the sweetie he is, he used it, a lot. BUT, it just broke. I'm so sad. It shattered but I saved a teat or two for the memories.

Last but not least, the most searched for phrase that brought people to my blog was:

Hot Blondes, Hot TX Blondes, blondes in short-shorts Bet this isn't exactly what they were looking for. hehe It was a post about me as a child: